Tag Archives: Jesus

Lord, It’s Time to Clean House…

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Create in me a clean heart

I hate cleaning.  I admit it.  I loathe it.  There is true enmity between dishes and me.  It is the thing I put off the most, and the thing I most need to do.  I have to be very intentional about making myself keep up on my cleaning duties.  Most of the time I fail, but I give it a valiant effort.

This last weekend I set about the task of getting two things done.  I wanted to get my house, “back in order,” as I like to say.  In other words, I had a week’s worth of dishes and laundry and clutter to deal with.  And, I wanted to start to clean out our basement.  Ugh.  The basement.  Two years ago it flooded.  We stacked up furniture in a dry corner and pulled up carpet in an effort to save as much as we could.  That time we did, but since then it’s flooded every third time it’s rained.  It’s awful.  So, I knew I need to just pitch most of what’s down there, and like all housework, I’ve been putting it off.

When my husband and I went down to start organizing things, we knew we had a big chore ahead of us.  What we found was not as bad as I’d imagined, but a whole lot of work.  The biggest issue is the mildew.  It’s growing in a lot of places and it’s going to be a battle getting rid of it.   It’s attached itself to things we treasure and we’ll have to clean.    We’ve lost a lot of things—nothing that can’t be replaced but still it was hard sorting through some of it.  It also hit me, “why have I been holding onto this stuff?”  Much of it I haven’t used in years, and it really didn’t need to be kept to begin with.  I just didn’t want to see it go.

The song “Whatever You’re Doing” by Sanctus Real kept running through my head as we took on this monstrous task.  The specific lyrics that resonated were:

“Time to face up,
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I’ve wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears”

As I worked on the two cleaning tasks I undertook this weekend, I got to thinking, “What sins and issues have I been putting off dealing with?”   I began to ask God to show me things that I had been avoiding cleaning out in my heart.  And, just like I asked Him to, He delivered.

The biggest sin He showed me just reared its ugly head a few days ago, but it was characteristic of something I don’t like admitting I struggle with—my temper.  This last flare-up was about something very dear to me—my Bible.  You see, since I’ve been working four jobs, I’ve had to grab my quiet time on the go.  So I’ve kept my Bible in my car’s passenger seat so it’s easy to grab.  The other night my daughter left something in the backseat, and for reasons that make no sense to me, she opened the front passenger door and climbed across the backseat to get it.  Her hands full, she carelessly didn’t close the passenger door behind her.  The result was about 6 barn cats climbing all over the seats.  And to top that off a thunderstorm came through.  The seat was drenched…and so was my Bible.  I have years of notes in the margins, and memories that go with them stored up in that volume.  And it was drenched.  I suppose I should thank the barn cats for setting off the warning lights or I’d have never gone out to check it until morning—by that time my Bible would have been ruined.  When I came back in, I was heartbroken.  I sat down and cried that something that was so precious was damaged—at the time I believed beyond repair.  (After a lot of work, I was able to salvage it.)  What made me mad though wasn’t that my daughter had carelessly caused this catastrophe, but rather her response to it.  She said it, “wasn’t her fault.”  I blew up.  I chewed her up one side and down the other.  I hurt her feelings the way mine were hurt.  I was so wrong.  I damaged her because something I loved was damaged.  How wrong of me.

God began to show me that, even though she was wrong in what she did and said, so was I.  My overreaction did not give her a good role model for dealing with adversity.  Instead, I was showing her that throwing a fit when something upsets me is acceptable.  It’s not.

“It’s time for healing time to move on
It’s time to fix what’s been broken too long
Time make right what has been wrong
It’s time to find my way to where I belong”

When we avoid sin it begins to turn into a similar scene as my basement.  We hold on to things we don’t really need—things that can cause damage if they’re left for too long.  They begin to mildew and break down.  They aren’t any good to us, so why do we keep avoiding dealing with them?  The worst part is that the sin we’re holding onto and not confronting can cause damage to other things that are of worth.  The mildew of it grows on the things we treasure—like relationships with our family, and with the Lord.

Avoiding sin is easy.  We just keep living upstairs and keep it up and running, but underneath, in the basement of our hearts, it’s still there, it’s not going away, and it’s destroying us little by little.

“Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow your will
or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is you want from me
I give everything I surrender…”

Lord, show me what I can do to fight off this sin nature that I detest so much and avoid.  I surrender…”whatever You’re doing inside of me…You’re up to something bigger than me.  Larger than life, something heavenly”  Let me be brave enough to say, “It’s time to face up.  Clean this old house.  Time breathe in and let everything out”

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan

Battling Bitterness

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“Break my heart for what breaks Yours.  Everything I am for Your kingdom’s cause…”

These are words to one of my favorite praise songs called “Hosanna.”  They have been a prayer of mine for a long time.  I want to be Christ’s servant in everything I do…it’s a tall order and some days a battle.  I’ve shared with you that I’ve been battling bitterness toward a group of people for a while now.  Two weekends ago God stripped that bitterness from me, and although Satan has tried to drag me back into the muck a couple of times, I’ve managed, with God’s help, to “not go there.”  It’s been a good week.   I’ve felt freer than I have been in a long time.  I can’t say that I’m ready to see these people and share a meal with them, but I’m getting there.  He’s answering my prayers to show me these women through His eyes.  He’s giving me empathy for them, and I’m actually forgiving them.  It’s something I wasn’t able to do in my own strength.  And, because it’s Him that’s refining me, I’m now able to help others in a way that I couldn’t help them before.  Amazingly He’s opened several doors to minister to those going through similar pain.  If these people had asked for my help just two weeks ago, I wouldn’t have answered in the way that He needed me to.

So, I thought I’d share some of the lessons God’s laid on my heart from my time battling bitterness.

1.     Don’t be afraid to tell God how hurt you are.  Many times we as Christians think we shouldn’t be weak.  This allows bitterness to get a foothold in our heart.  It’s a natural progression—in our sin nature—to want to lash out at those who have hurt us.  It’s not in our nature to “turn the other cheek,” and to forgive them.  But, in Ephesians 4:31-32 we’re commanded to, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”  I’ve found that acknowledging my pain, and giving it to God daily, helps when I am hurting.  It also gives me permission to be okay where I am.  Telling God that I’m hurting opens me up to His will and perfect love.  Locking it all up means that I’m not okay with where I am…and this gives Satan a chance confuse and manipulate me.

2.     Have a plan.  So many times I catch myself running down a list of all the horrible things these women did.  I have found that if I have a plan to stop my thoughts from going down a path that leads to bitterness,  then I can battle the war going on inside me much better.  I have two verses that I claim regularly to keep my mind on the right track.  The first is Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”  Whenever I caught myself sinking into anger and bitterness,  I would repeat this verse to myself.  Then, I would practice it by listing all the things that are good, and noble, and true about my life right now.

The second verse that helped was Hebrews 12:1, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that  hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the   race marked out for us…”  This verse helped me to remember that when these women were lying about me, and plotting to cause me harm, that God knew the truth.  He had placed witnesses in the heavenly realms that would intercede on my       behalf.  My job was not to worry about what was being said about me, but to focus on the sins that were entangling me and to walk through this trial with God as my companion.

 3.     Happiness is a choice.  When life is hard, it’s easy to get depressed and angry, but when we remember that we can choose to be happy,  then we have control over the outcome of our situation.  So many times I’d run into people who had heard about what I’d been going through.  I would choose to stay positive in my conversations with them.  It wasn’t easy.  I wanted to bad-mouth the women who were hurting me.  I wanted the world to know who they really were…but by choosing to remain calm and trying to stay positive, I left a lot of doors open.  I’ve been able to help others through similar situations because they trusted me and saw that I was trying to follow God through this valley.
4.     Let the God be your Lord.  This is the biggest one.  It’s more important than any other idea I’ve presented.  Lynda Randle, the speaker at the Women’s Retreat a couple of weeks back, said, “Jesus was my savior, but He wasn’t my Lord”  while she was sharing her testimony on the first night.  This phrase stuck with me.  There’s a big difference between Jesus providing a way for us to get to Heaven, and us letting Him be the Lord of our lives daily.  He tells us we must forgive.  So we must.  He tells us that we must pray for our enemies.  So we must.  He tells us to cast our cares upon Him.  So we must.  He must be our Lord.

Bitterness is a stronghold of the enemy.  It is a dark place within our hearts, and if we let it fester it will become a barrier between us and our Lord.  God wants to use us, but He can’t if we’re filled with malice and hatred.  We can’t really see people through God’s eyes when ours are blinded by sin.  If we really mean it that we want to be broken for what breaks God’s heart, we must empty ourselves of self and allow Him to fill us.  So we can say, “Everything I am for Your kingdom’s cause…” Oh Lord grant me that privilege.  Amen.

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan

Retreating from God

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I made a harsh realization this weekend.  Even though I’ve been closer to God in the last few months than I have been in years, even though this season in my life has me leaning on Him more than ever– I’ve been retreating from Him. I’ve been shying away when He convicts me in one certain area.  This area is tender…any mention of it makes my heart quiver.  I’m still very broken.  So, I’ve built up a shell around my hurt, kind of like a scab, or scales.  The problem is that the scales have gotten in the way of the wound really healing.  What I’ve done to protect myself has only made my pain deeper and last longer than it really needed to…and that all changed this past weekend.

Every year, since my first year of marriage, I have attended a ladies retreat with my church friends.  I’ll never forget the first year: strapped for cash, ladies whom I hardly knew offered to pay my way, offered to bless me.  I was too proud to accept their kindness though, and I ended up scrounging up the money to go.  I was so blessed by the experience.  I don’t even remember who the speaker was or what she spoke about, but I do remember going back to my cabin in tears and those same sweet ladies ministering to a very scared newlywed.  I just love these ladies.   I can’t speak enough about how having them in my life has changed me, blessed me…they’ve discipled me.

This year is my thirteenth year going to Retreat.  Every year I come planning to be renewed and loved on by my Heavenly Father, and every year He shows up.  I prayed as I entered beautiful Rock Springs that He would show up again this year.   I prayed that I would be His vessel if others needed help.  I prayed that I would be renewed.  It’s been such a hard year, and I needed to retreat.  I immediately felt the presence of the Holy Spirit speaking to my soul…I felt Him whispering a love song to me. I settled into my rest and was full of Joy to be at a place that has been a spiritual renewal for me for so long…and then, my sin nature reared its ugly head.

When I arrived at our cabin, I discovered all of the beds were already taken.  Frustrated, I went from room to room trying to find a spot for me and my best friend, who wasn’t able to arrive until later in the evening.  My frustration must have been pretty evident because one of the ladies from our group came to my rescue and helped me make up a rollaway bed in the living room next to a pull-out couch.  The thoughts rolling through my brain weren’t nice and are not worth repeating.  I’m working four jobs to make ends meet right now, and I was so aggravated that the fee I’d had to save, scrimp, and go without meals for didn’t even get me a bed.  I’m just glad I kept my cool.  I texted my friend, “I’m grumpy about [not having a bed], so it’s your job to make me thankful I’m here…K!”  I was trying to make light of the situation.  Her response, “We can deal!  Guess that means you will have to stay up with me in the main room till everyone goes to sleep.  LOL!”  I’m so glad I have a friend who understands me.  She knew I needed her to not empathize but to tell me to grow up.  It’s a real blessing to have a friend like that.

I wish this was the end of my grumpiness, but it wasn’t.  When I arrived at the dining hall, I discovered that one of the women who had treated me so terribly at my last job was at Retreat as well.  There are four ladies that I worked with who sinned terribly against me, and one of them was here!  At my retreat!  At the retreat I’d faithfully attended every year of my marriage.   She was like the evil sidekick to my arch nemesis, and she was here!  I felt my back tighten, my shoulders hunch, and the scales around my pain shift into protective layers.

I left the dining hall hardly speaking.  I probably would have been muttering had I spoken at all.  But no one asked me to, thankfully, and I quietly found my seat.  The praise team entered and I obligingly stood.  I was grumbling in my spirit to God.  This is retreat!  I’m supposed to be getting my spiritual tank filled.  “God, I can’t focus on you when she’s here.  My back is going to go out on that stinking rollaway too!  I shouldn’t have come!  She’s probably watching me right now, waiting for me to look like an idiot praising you!  She’s probably watching to see when I cry and when I don’t.  She wants to see me hurt.  She’s evil!  God why is she here!  This is so unfair!”  Then, the words I’d been mechanically singing broke through my tantrum.

“This is my prayer in the fire,

in weakness or trial or pain,

there is a faith proved of more worth than gold,

so refine me Lord through the flames.”

And the Chorus,

“I will bring praise,

I will bring praise,

no weapon formed against me shall remain…”

God spoke to my hurt.  “Child, I know you are hurt.  I am angry you are in pain.  My pain is greater than yours because not only were you hurt, but, those who injured you did it out of their own pain.”  And then, “You are here because I need to strip you of your scales.   You have to heal if you are to complete the tasks I have for you.  I can heal you, but you have to let me tear the scales from your wounds.”  I was sobbing before our speaker even entered the stage.  God impressed upon me the image of Eustace Scrubb in C.S. Lewis’ The Dawn Treader.  Where he’d been turned into a dragon and Aslan had to tear the scales from his body in order for him to be restored.  It was quite an image.  I prayed, “Lord, if this is what I must do, I have faith that You will do what I need.”

Since the time that I decided to leave my last job, I felt like I had to prove that I was right.  God has told me I was, but I felt that I needed the world to know it too.  He taught me so much this weekend.  It was a divine appointment. I’ve been frustrated because my husband, who has been amazingly supportive of me, hasn’t continued to let me vent to him about my hurt.  He has asked me to forgive them…but whenever I tried, I started going down a laundry list of all the sins they’d committed against me and my anger and bitterness would come up and I would quit praying for them and start complaining about them.  I have been trying to practice the principle of forgiving a sin 70 X 7 times, but I’m failing.  God showed me that I didn’t have to win.  I needed to be broken.  I can’t change them.  They have their own crosses, crosses of their own making to bear, and it’s not my job to fix them, or to make them pay.  I prayed that He erase the laundry list of sins they’ve committed against me from my head.  Little by little, God tore each scale away this weekend.  He stripped me bare of my bitterness and anger.

So much more happened this weekend than I can fit into this blog.   First of all, my back didn’t go out on the rollaway, and we even found a bed for my dearest friend.  She also continued to not let me wallow in my frustrations and proved, yet again, why she is my confidant.  Best of all, the messages the speaker, Lynda Randle, gave spoke right into my pain.  She recently went through loss and pain, and she shared from that.  Sunday’s final message was on healing broken relationships…talk about a God thing.

I didn’t go to Retreat planning to have my scales ripped from my spirit.  I went planning to be renewed.  But God knew best.  He knew that while at Retreat He could stop my retreat from Him.  As the last verse of that precious praise song went, “This is my prayer in the harvest, when favor and providence flow, I know I’m filled to be emptied again, The seed I’ve received I will sow.”  Thank you Lord for giving me fresh seeds to sow this weekend.  I’m now ready to accept the blessings you so graciously want to bestow upon me.  I’m empty Lord, fill me up.

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan

Here are some photos of our beautiful Retreat.

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I’m trying to be a lighthouse…

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“We are told to let our light shine, and if it does, we won’t need to tell anybody it does. Lighthouses don’t fire cannons to call attention to their shining- they just shine.”

–DL Moody.

Something’s been bugging me.  Ever since I wrote my last blog, I’ve felt like I didn’t go deep enough.  Sometimes, when writing, we writers have to focus our work on a pretty narrow topic in order to really get the point across, and so sometimes the end result feels a little watered down.  I mashed up what God is doing in my heart into bite-sized pieces.  But, what He’s doing inside me is much deeper than what I get down on paper.  I know that this is what “good” writers do—otherwise we’d be so boring no one would want to read what we have to say.  So, I’m going to attempt to put into succinct words the depth that he’s been laying on my heart.

Jesus said His greatest two commandments were to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” And to “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  All of the other commandments are built from these two simple statements.   These may seem simple, but they are hard to live up to.  I’d challenge you that when you really look at your heart, you’re failing in these two areas just like I am.  It’s hard to keep your eyes on Christ and love Him first.  It’s even harder to treat those around us—who may be secular and not living like they’re supposed to—with the love we give to ourselves.  There are so many sins that get in a Christian’s way.  Being Christ to the world gets lost in translation sometimes.  We put people off because of pride:  we know we’re right and they’re wrong.  So, they need to just “get with the program.”  I’ve heard good Christians talk about politics in a way that makes my heart break.  Their argument was that they were fighting for the right things, so what if they stomp on a few toes in the process. What’s been bothering me so much is the way we go about making our point: whether we’re right or not, if we sin while delivering the message, then we’re getting in Christ’s way!  I’ll give you a couple of clear examples.

The first example is from an article I read published by Kirk Cameron.  The article was on non-negotiables for being a dad.  (http://kirkcameron.com/2013/09/8-non-negotiables-dads-daughters/)  It was a nice article and I enjoyed reading it.  Then I got to the comments.  A self-proclaimed atheist made a classic comment on the sins of Christianity. I read as a couple readers tried to minister to this man, but soon they were drowned out by the onslaught of attacks against him.  Here’s one, “Ahh, [name omitted] … you spew garbage. But, when one lives in the dumps, that’s all they know. Ain’t that right, bubba.” Yikes…my heart sank.  Christians were not behaving like Christ.  And the man’s response was right on the money:  “I’m starting to get enjoyment out of this.  You proclaim yourself as a Christian but conduct yourself poorly, it just provides [proves] my point with every insult, but maybe I should just listen to some of the Good Christians on here and not judge them by your actions.”

I see it all the time.  Christians are sinners, I grant that, but we let Satan drag our attention away from the issues—in this case a good article on fatherhood—and we drag Christ through the muck with us.  We tarnish His name.  I’m just as guilty of this as anyone.  I used to be a debate coach.  I love a good debate…but when I’m winning that battle by attacking the other person, I’m the one who’s wrong—even if my point isn’t.

The second example I found was in the article Why You’re Teaching Your Daughter to be a Mean Girl (http://m.ksl.com/index/story/sid/26861581?mobile_direct=y#.UjwuzhQsFjY.facebook ).   Another awesome article, and the author hit the nail on the head when she wrote, “Social media has created an atmosphere where people feel entitled to peek in on every aspect of your life. People feel entitled to say whatever they want. I cannot tell you how many times I have observed mothers, via social media, being downright nasty to one another about anything and everything. It is shocking and sad. But if it starts with us, it has to end with us. It’s our responsibility, as mothers, to do everything in our power to make sure we aren’t (even unknowingly) raising mean girls.”  I see this everyday on Facebook!  It’s crazy.  We don’t even know people and yet we’re attacking them. I fear social media has allowed us to devalue human life.  We don’t see people as people because we can’t see them, touch them, or be a part of their lives.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m a Facebook junkie.  But I do fear what will become of us as we delve more and more into a world where humanity isn’t tangible.

So, we all know there’s a problem, but, what do we do. Martin Luther King said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”  Profound words, and hard ones.  Especially when we believe we are right and we’re being attacked.  You say, “We can’t change this in a day.”  You’re right.  We can’t.  It’s a day-by-day deal.  My grandma always told me that I might be the only Bible some people ever read…I better get it right.  That doesn’t mean proving others wrong with my words, but rather with my life.  I have to live the life that glorifies Christ.  I think of how He answered when He was attacked.  He answered with kindness and love, usually with scripture, and He didn’t attack back.  You don’t find many times where Jesus lost his temper.  Every word He spoke had a purpose and He was never rash.  My interactions must be a reflection of Christ or I’m failing Him.  I have to remember His word and treat others like I want to be treated—not how they treat me.  I have to remember to keep my eyes on Him and love Him first and then put everyone else on the same plane as myself.  I have to remember to get the plank out of my eye so I can see clearly to help others with the speck in theirs.  I have to remember that when I am talking to any other person on this earth, that they are His child whether they acknowledge Him or not.  I have to remember that a gentle answer turns away wrath, and that sometimes I don’t need to answer at all because, as DL Moody said, “We are told to let our light shine, and if it does, we won’t need to tell anybody it does. Lighthouses don’t fire cannons to call attention to their shining- they just shine.”  I pray that my light is clear and bright for Him.

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan

Lessons on Legalism: Part I

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An Explanation

Those of you who know me, know that I have been working in Christian education for the last three years.  While I worked in that atmosphere, I learned many important lessons about Christ, His character, and who I am in Him.  I’m still working through many of my feelings about this season in my life, but I want to make it clear that this post is not meant to “bash” the school I worked at.  It is not meant to “bash” certain people who worked there, or Christian education as a whole.  These are lessons that I’m sorting through, and I pray writing this is helping me to process and apply these lessons.  I may not always feel the way I do today.  God has a way of refining me little by little and not all at once.  I’m sure as time passes, I’ll grow to see the big picture and what God was doing during this time.  I pray that the lessons I’m going to share with you in my next four blogs are helpful and that they bless you.  I am being very careful not to attack anyone, but because you need to understand where I have been the last three years in order to understand these lessons, I am going to list examples from my experience.  I will not be giving any names, and the examples I’m listing are pretty benign, meaning they are not representative of the worst situations that I experienced.   They are actually representative of the pettiest things that happened.  I’m doing this deliberately not only so that you can see simple examples, but also to protect those who were involved.  Some of these examples have a huge back-story that I’m not going to explain.  It is not the purpose of this blog to vent or to gain approval of my actions or feelings.  I hope this makes sense.  Additionally, I pray that God leads my hands as I write.  I pray that this post is a blessing and not a hindrance to any person’s faith.

A Definition

What is Legalism?  Wikipedia defines it as a “pejorative term referring to an over-emphasis on discipline of conduct, or legal ideas, usually implying an allegation of misguided rigor, pride, superficiality, the neglect of mercy, and ignorance of the grace of God or emphasizing the letter of law at the expense of the spirit. Legalism is alleged against any view that obedience to law, not faith in God’s grace, is the pre-eminent principle of redemption.”  To put it simply, it is a direct focus on the works of the sinner and not the grace of the King.  It is a simplistic faith that many are drawn to because it’s easy.  A + B = C.  Black and White.  Simple.

But, God does not call us to a simplistic faith.  He calls us to a complex one.  He knows we’re going to get our hands dirty.  If we’re truly following Him, life will be hard.  His life on earth wasn’t easy.  Jesus didn’t stay in the lines of organized religion.  He drew outside of them.   I love the song “My Jesus” by Todd Agnew.  It does an excellent job describing the Jesus I know and love.  The truth is that when we are drawn into legalism, we are either going to stop growing as a Christian, or we’re going to tick a bunch of people off—which is exactly what I did.

But, I want to be clear, I am in no way advocating disavowing the Law.  Romans 6: 1-2 says, “What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?”  If we are following Christ on this great adventure that is life, we cannot continue to live in sin.  He won’t let us.  Although He didn’t follow the “rules,” he never sinned.  That is the life He’s calling us into.  It is not okay to break the law because we don’t agree with it.  Rather, if our focus is on Christ, and not on the law, we will live in His grace.  We will grow in our faith.  And, we will not be drawn into sin.

A Couple Simple Examples

Here are three examples of my time living and working in a legalistic environment.

1.     Dancing is evil.  I taught 7th through 12th grade.  I didn’t have very many students, but the students I did have mentioned one of the things they’d miss most about going to public high school was a prom.  We didn’t have organized sports or academic activities either;  the school  was primarily focused on their education.  So, after visiting with some of the parents about it, I visited with the other teachers.  The response from them was adamant.  Dancing, and public dances are all evil.  They were shocked I would consider it.  Truth be told, I thought that if the parent organization wanted to put together a banquet for the students, I was all for it.  However, I didn’t have an issue with a dance.  If it’s well supervised and good music was played, then I thought it might even be a blessing.

2.     Modern Christian music is dangerous.  One of the things three of my female students wanted to do in a parade was play Jamie Grace music and twirl batons.  I was trying to find a way that we could play the music loud enough for the spectators to hear, when another teacher challenged me.  She said she felt that any music that “sounded” like secular music was dangerous and wouldn’t be a good representation of our school.  She wanted to know if my students could twirl to an old hymn so that the music would be “different” from what the worldy teens were used to.  I tried to explain that my students were trying to show that being a Christian isn’t uncool, but that we can have a lot of fun too.  But, the issue was pushed until my students decided it was too much of a hassle to do it at all.  They didn’t twirl in the parade.

3.     Showing grace is too much to ask.  One of my students, during a mentoring session with younger kids, mentioned that she was often frustrated with her father–a common tween to teen feeling.  I was confronted by a teacher about the exchange.  The teacher conceded that the student wasn’t making fun of her dad, or even being truly disrespectful, but that she didn’t think that it was good for her to be disparaging her relationship with her father in front of younger students.  She went on to insist that my student not be allowed to mentor any more because of the comment she made.  I told her I thought that was a little too strong of a response.  I assured her that I would talk to the student about being respectful to her elders, whether she’s getting along with them or not—which I did.  However, the teacher in question didn’t let it go.  I found myself discussing it with her several more times.  She wanted the young lady removed from the mentoring program and even verbally attacked the student’s Christian character when I didn’t bend to her will.

Here’s the crux–scripture can back each of these examples up.  Dancing, although it’s done in the Bible by many of God’s people, can be viewed as lewd behavior.  At times it really is a sin; I agree with that.  However, that is not to say that what these students were asking for was sinful.  Often legalistic people use the argument that we must, “avoid the appearance of sin,” as an excuse to ban anything they are uncomfortable with.  That is also the excuse to ban music—Christian or not.  Finally, it’s obvious what scriptural example was used in the last example:  “Honor your father and mother.”  However, what each of these examples is missing is Christ.  Jesus never said that it was a sin to dance.  In fact, King David, was known for his dancing and he was called “a man after my own heart,” by God.  Additionally, I truly doubt that Jesus would disparage Jamie Grace’s (an awesome new Christian musician) music because it sounds like songs that are on secular radio.  The words don’t sound anything like secular radio.  “Lord I love it when You hold me…” were the lyrics to the chorus.  Finally, God calls us to show grace and mercy to all people—even ones who make mistakes.

What it all Boils Down to

What legalism is at its core is a faith that is built on works and not grace.  People who become legalistic in their day-to-day walk have forgotten that they are depraved sinners who are nothing without Christ.  They have replaced a daily search for Christ with a pride that they know best, and a self-righteousness built from the laws they follow.  The truth is, it’s easier to live like that, than to live like Christ.  We are called to take up our cross (a instrument of execution) and follow Him.  That’s not easy. Not at all.  In Corinthians Paul describes people who are living this lifestyle.  He says, “But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ.  I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready, for you are still of the flesh. For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way?”  (I Corinthians 3:1-3)  We humans want to be in control.  We don’t like feeling weak.  We don’t like to admit we don’t know the answers and that the answers aren’t always easy.  Legalists believe they know the answers.  They live in a world where everything is black and white, and there are no shades of grey.  Following their rules gives them control.  So if we are living in legalism, we are not growing.  God wants to offer us steak, but we’re stuck drinking the milk of babies.

Personally, I prefer steak.

Over the next month I’ll be expounding on the dangers of legalism.  I hope these bless you, challenge you, and make you grow.  The time I spent in living in legalism has definitely done that to me.

Also, if you haven’t liked my facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/stayingalert) please do so.  I am starting a daily bible study tomorrow to further challenge me, and to, hopefully, bless you.

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan

Am I there yet, Lord?

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My daughter and me on our vacation.

My daughter and me on our vacation.

Good day!  I’ve been pondering where to start with my blog.  It’s been hard.  I’m pretty opinionated, and–like most women–I’ve always got a lot on my mind.  I didn’t want to go “too deep” on my first real post and run anyone away, but I’m not looking to write fluff either.  So, Here’s what I came up with.  I hope you are blessed by it! 

“Are we there yet???”

We just returned from a wonderful vacation.  It was one we really needed after a stressful year.  Our daughter, who is normally super sweet and pretty easy going, is in a rather impatient stage right now.  And, since our trip included 18 hours worth of driving, we heard the stereotypical childhood complaints from the back seat.  Overall, she wasn’t terrible about it, but we did have to remind her about every 10 miles to be patient, that there are good things around the corner–to enjoy the ride, and the blessings God has allowed us to experience.  You know, good parent “stuff.”  All of that “stuff” came back to bite me today, as I was complaining to God about my current situation.

You see, when I gave in and decided to be a teacher (“gave in” is the appropriate phrase here, it’s not that I didn’t want to be a teacher, but I’ll get to that in another post.)  I saw myself being much like my parents were and working in the same district for 30+ years.  I wanted to see my student’s children come through my classroom.  I wanted to invest in a community and leave a legacy behind me, like they did.  Unfortunately, that has not been God’s plan for me.  Up-to-date, I’ve worked in three public schools and one private school.  I have made lasting relationships with many of my students, but I haven’t stayed very long in one place–as per my dream.  I can honestly say that each time I made a change I did so knowing I was following God’s will.  I knew that He had a real plan and that it was my job to follow His lead.

I just started a new job this week.  It’s one that I want.  I know God’s in it, because he’s indicated as much when I’m in my quiet time. A bonus is that I get to work for an awesomely fun, godly lady.  It’s work, but it’s cake too.  But, it’s not enough to pay the bills.  So, I’m looking to add to it.  And, I’m not sure what God wants me to do to fill the gap.  I know that I’m burned out and need some rest from teaching.  My last job had me teaching 4 courses to 6 grade levels.  It was an impossible job, and although I did it to the best of my ability, I know the kids would have benefited from having more teachers.  I’m so glad that the school has now done what I kept pushing for and hired more teachers to fill my position.  But, I digress.  As I was working today, two things happened.  First, a young lady, who I’d had in class before, stopped into the shop for lunch and a visit.  We were visiting about her school years and I truly enjoyed the conversation.  It was a huge blessing.  Second, a sweet friend stopped in and visited too.  She didn’t know I was working there, so we spent some time catching up.  I filled her in on why I wanted a job where I didn’t have to make lesson plans and grade papers.  She totally understood, and empathized.

Here’s where I became like my daughter.  I started getting really down after both of these conversations.  They were both uplifting and a blessing, but I caught myself complaining to God.  “Why aren’t I there yet Lord?”  This is not the life I had planned for myself.  This is not supposed to be in the works.  I’m supposed to be tenured with a growing retirement and onto my second generation of students.  Although I love my new job, and it’s blessing me immensely, I started thinking, “what’s wrong with me?”  I want to feel like I’ve arrived.  I want to feel like I’m part of some grand plan.  I want, I want, I want…

Then it hit me.  What had I been saying to my sweet daughter, Mattie,  just a week ago?  God whispered in my ear, “we’re not there yet, but there’s good things around the corner.  Enjoy the blessings that I’m giving you.  Don’t be anxious for what’s to come, but live in the now.  I’m here.  I didn’t promise you an easy life, but I did promise that I’d bless you and I’d be with you…”  And He went on from there.

I flashed back to the mixed feelings I had when Mattie was grousing.  I knew what was coming and I wanted her to enjoy the plans we’d made for her.  I was disappointed with her impatience because I knew that the trip could be one of her best memories–not just the destination.  I started apologizing to God.  I knew that I’d made my heavenly father feel that same disappointment.  He knows what’s coming.  It’s a blessing.  But He wants me to stay in the now…and not worry about what’s around the bend.

Two well known verses came to mind immediately too–I love it when God reinforces what he lays on our hearts with His Word.  The first is Jeremiah 29:11, “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'”  God knows the destination.  He knows what’s coming, even though we don’t.  He knows that it’s a blessing.  He wants us to, “… throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,  fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.” Hebrews 12:1-3.

Okay Lord, I’ll be patient.

Staying Alert in Christ,

Megan